Vaction, What is That?!

Let’s Take a Trip!

Let us start with this: VACATIONS with a baby and toddler are a fucking joke.
Vacations are supposed to be fun and RELAXING, but with kids it is the complete opposite. I will go as far as saying it is much worse than a busy week at home.
During vacation, you are in an unfamiliar place, with no baby-proofing and the world’s most dangerous objects in arm’s reach. No one cares where they put their knives and 10ft iPhone chargers. So worrying about the “little issues” skyrockets and I’m left in a constant state of panic and anxiety. Then you have to deal with your little ones being around so many different people and thinking it is the new cool thing to not listen to a single thing I say to show off, and everyone will think it is the funniest thing in the world, and the laughing will just encourage this nasty behavior.

What Schedule?

I think the worst part of this thing called “vacation” is that schedules go straight out the window. Eating schedules, nap times, sleeping schedules, scheduled 10 minutes for this momma to hide so I don’t go insane, all go straight to hell. People that don’t have kids, or with much older kids, think we can do whatever they want at any given moment and at any time of the day. Oh, you want to go to dinner at 6:30? Great, that’s bed time, it looks like we won’t be able to make it. Oh, but you want to see the babies? Sure, you know that all you will be seeing is their epic meltdowns, and screaming little voices right, RIGHT?! You want us to be out on the beach all day? You realize that by the time we pack up our 45.6 pounds of gear, and get to the beach and situate, both kids will be screaming, hot, tired, hungry, and the baby will have missed 2 of 3 naps of the day already? But no problem, we’ll be there, because it is vacation and we’re supposed to have fun and hangout! Yay…

No, just no. I need a vacation from the vacation I just took, alone. Completely alone. But let’s face it, We have a lot to do when we get back.

Coming Down

Because it doesn’t end there, it doesn’t just go back to normal when we get home. No fricken way. It will take 2-3 WEEKS to get everything back on track. The house somehow needs to be cleaned, even when you haven’t been there in a week. The kids think it is still vacation so they think they don’t have to help. We need to get those schedules back on track, but at this point, we just need to find a new schedule that works for us but it will never be the same again. The fridge needs all new food, you have to get everything prepped for the week. Switching gears is just hard.

Maybe it is just me or because I have very young kids. Maybe other parents with older kids get to enjoy their vacation more. I hope so, that would be FANTASTIC, and gives me something to look forward to. I’ll have to find out in the years to come. Until then, vacation will never be a true vacation.

How old are your kids? What does your vacation look like? Share your stories below!


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