Stop Making Excuses, And Fucking Take Care Of Yourself

Self-Care

Self care is a wonderful thing. Taking care of yourself is an important task, and we often put that step last, while we take care of everyone else. We hear about it all the time from just about everyone lately. We see all the Pinterest posts about self care steps. Take a bath, put on a face mask, turn your phone off, go for a walk. All these “things” to help ease the stress of life.

Well I’m calling bullshit.

Now before you jump down my throat, and shun me, I must tell you I L.O.V.E my bubble bathes, with a crackling candle, full glass of wine, and a face full of clay. I get down to some self care, and I will enjoy every moment. I will also wish I could do it every single day like some self care, YASSSS QUEEN, fairy.

There Is More To It

If taking a bath and reading a book can solve all your problems, then sister, more power to you. Can you lend me some?

While I love doing these things, its not mountain moving for me. I don’t feel instantly recharged and ready to take on the next task. It is a great way to end a long day, and check in, but it doesn ‘t stop there. You deserve more than just a band aid to your problems. You matter so much that you are worthy of digging a little bit to take your self care to the max!

Some of these things are just the first steps for me. They allow me to slow down so I can see the bigger picture. So I can see what is really making me feel run down, and stressed out.

The Bigger Picture

Lets get real.

Rarely is it ever the fact that I haven’t taking a bath in X amount of days that’s pissing me off.

The real thing is a bigger issue. Maybe its my mental health. My brain is going a million miles a minute and has me exhausted. I’m to the point where in stuck in bed, and I don’t know what my next move is. My to-do list is running circles around me. By the time I realize I’m in the hole, it’s too late for a face mask to work.

There are stages of getting out of this funk,

Stage 1 Getting out of bed

Now that may not seem hard to some of ya’ll, but for me it is difficult. I can, and will sleep all day and all night. So getting up and out of bed is hard, and staying out of bed is even worse.

S shower. I mean REALLY showering. Wash the hair, shave, do all the things you do.

Stage 2 DON’T GET BACK IN BED

Once I crawl back in bed all nice and clean, the process will start all over again.

Do something, anything. Get out of the house. Target, lets go.

Stage 3 Recover from going out

While it was needed to get me going, for the first outing after being stuck in bed, is exhausting.

This is where bath time, candles, reading, music, wine, chocolate all come into play.

Stage 4 What is Really Going On?

This is when I feel like real self care comes in. This is where the real change is going to come in, and make you feel like a million bucks. You will be getting to know the real issue, and putting any amount of effort into fixing the under lying cause will have you winning.

Do you have so much to do, you don’t know what to do first? Honey, write it out. Get the thoughts out on paper, and your list won’t hunt your thoughts. Start with something small, go from there. Maybe tackle only one big task a day. Take it easy on yourself.

Do you have a bill you’ve been putting off and hiding from? I’ve been there, plenty. Dig that bill up, answer the collection call and give them a little bit of what they want. Most of the time, they won’t make you pay the full bill. If you have $20-$50 dollars, start paying it. It will make the bill go down, stop the collection calls, and give you a huge sigh of relief. Just a little amount made me feel so much better, like I was finally getting ahead of the problem.

Are you sick, and have been pushing through for everyone else in your life? STOP NOW. I know your kids have places to be, and your partner needs to go to work, and all your friends are busy, and you might not have family around to help. Put all that aside for two second because YOU MATTER TOO. Take yourself to the doctors and get back up. I’m still recovering from being sick that sent me in to an asthma attack that lasted for hours, HOURS, like 11 hours before I could hardly breathe before I asked for help. Yes I got yelled at by the doctor and was informed I could have died.

Can you still not get out of bed because, well, depression? First of all, I’m sorry, I know it sucks. I’m battling it too. Its hard to get up, but you are worth it. You deserve to live a beautiful life. Call a friend, maybe even family. Make an appointment for a doctor or therapy. Nothing is wrong for reaching out and getting the help you need. You matter, and you are worthy of being happy. Start small with just showering, and getting out of bed. If you can do more from there, do it! If not, tomorrow is a new day, and they never stop coming. So keep trying.

My point is, listen to your body.

What your body is REALLY telling you. Slowing down and slapping some mud on your face is only the first step. You have some more work to do after that. Go to the doctor, pay a bill, fix your car, write your to-do list, and start moving.

What is your self care plan? Do you have stages? What is your biggest struggle right now?

 

 

 

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